Productive Member

The past few days have been filled with an emotional roller coaster of sorts. Addie started solids, well Quinoa homemade cereal to be exact. Hopefully it will help her gain more weight as it sure is not helping her sleep better at night (one could have hoped). My friend came up for a visit and we spent time shopping and talking about all things that bother us. It was much needed.

It was also filled with anger and tears about work. My dear husband is in a job that while pays well, it does not leave you feeling like a great person at the end of the day. His boss is the cause of this as is a missed opportunity with the company. My husband tried his best (and his best is pretty freaking awesome) but his boss, who is disliked by all the managers in the department, has decided to hold him back from this opportunity. Even with multiple employee endorsements and another managers feelings that he should get this chance said boss has decided that he rather not.

I cried out of anger so much friday and days before because I know my husband deserved it. He has been patient and put in so much of his time (being salaried royally sucks sometimes) and to have this happen is such a slap in the face. I wish I could support us. I wish that he could quit and not deal with this constant self esteem sucking machine. I wish I was a more productive member of this family financially. I take care of Addie, the bills, and for the most part the house. I just wish I could take care of us financially too while I did all of that. I want him to feel empowered and be able to tell this guy thanks but no thanks and walk away. I want him to not take it as such a blow because even though it is he is worth so much more than what the company makes him think.

I wish I could fix things but instead I feel helpless.